well aiko did it again.
She said she was busy today right?
She then calls to tell me she’s going to her friends room. Obviously not busy for her.
THen discover she’s gone to the bar in a party.
And said exactly what I knew she would.
I went to my friends room, she told me about the party, i forgot my mobile phone.

She spoke to me for a while, I went to say hello to the people, she then chatted with a Chinese guy and then with a British guy (who seemed deep into her). She didn’t even come over to me or check to see if I was still at the party after I left….

Fuck it. I give up. I’ve tried my hardest, ruined my future for her, and ruined my relationships with my friends, as well as risked that with my family.

Lets see what she says tomorrow.

Tell me all, if your girl said something and did something else, what would you do?

It seems like Aiko likes to fight for fun.
After all of what’s been happening, I’ve been wondering… Why am I with her?
I even gave up going to second year just so i could be with her in the same uni… Of course I didnt tell her that though…

She said she would either come Friday or Saturday. I knew that she wouldn’t come on Friday, and I have a feeling she’ll give me an excuse for Saturday as well.
I asked her to check the movies to see what she would like to watch. Today she said, I dont really see anything I am interested in, why dont you find a movie and go with a friend.
I really think she’s stupid. We go to the movies to be together, we watch movies because the other one enjoys it more. Why the hell am I going to the stupid river dance? She knows I’m not interested in it, but I’m going to be with her…

One day I think I’ll just give up on this relationship… I’ve invested too much already.

Someone who tell me she cares about me so much, and gives me so much pain is a strange one.
I dont think this is a culture thing at all, it must be an Aiko thing, she’s not like other girls.
I hate it when she disagree’s with everything, I hate it when gets technical for no reason, I hate it when she gets stressed.
Thing is, if I broke up with her, I’d feel even more depressed. Its like I lose either way.

I feel she’s selfish, sometimes uncaring, and the biggest hypocrit on earth.
For example, she said that she couldn’t come out because she needed to study. (she was in the library previously) I thought I would do something nice and bought her flowers. I called and she said she was in her room. I said I would be passing by to give her a secret after an hour. She then said, leave for tomorrow because I need to go to the library and can’t wait.
So I gave the flowers to Omar, my friend, and asked him to pass by the library and give them to her. He called her a number of times but she didnt answer.
So he goes to her flat and see’s that she’s just finished dinner…. with friends….
Now here is the thing. She couldn’t wait for me to give her the flowers, but she could sit with friends???
WHen I asked about this, she said it was because one of her friends was leaving forever…..
The next day I discover her friend is not leaving after all because she needs to have surgury. OK, so Aiko didn’t know that she would be staying, but the point is, AS USUAL, she picks her friends over me and I really felt that I couldn’t even do something nice for her like give her flowers…..

Tell me am I wrong to feel this angry and stressed?

Yesterday I was in the SU building. Aiko called me to say hello (after I made a big issue of her never calling) and told me she was on the way to her room. (her room is just passed the SU building) So I said, why dont you come and say hello in person? She said, I’m saying hello to you on the phone and I’m almost home… What the FUCK is this?! It’s like she’s too lazy to just take a few steps back and say hello to me.

I honestly feel that she doesn’t give a shit anymore.

SELFISH SELFISH!
When was the last time she bought me something small? When was the last time she wrote me a letter? Sent me an email? Asked ME to go out? Wasted time with me instead of friends?

*sighs*
I hope one day she reads this blog by mistake…
or my old one
www.xanga.com/khalifa

And not want to break up with me just to make my life easier, but to STAY with me and become a better person.

Well yesterday I received a P910! I guess thats good seeing as I was robbed of my 6630. I also bought an NEC338 to work with my 3 sim. It’s just a cheap little phone, but it’s better than nothing.

I’m going to upload my pics of the Japan trip now!
Hopefully add a little comentary later on as well.

One thing thats pissing me off is that I cant find my PSP Charger!! What the hell!!!!

My time in Japan was not bad.
At the end of my trip I was left thinking that Japan is simply hyped up. I didn’t see as much advanced technology as I thought I would and people are much quieter than I thought. I haven’t seen many Japopunks either. I travelled ALL OVER Tokyo (which is huge) and also in Niigata but it just felt like a change of atmosphere to me.

To be honest, Aiko kind of ruined it for me.
She didnt meet me at the airport in time so I felt bad waiting alone, she kept on getting stressed, she spent almost all of her money (when she should have saved it to spend with me), and I felt like I didnt have much freedom. She acted like a mother rather than a girlfriend.

I think that if I went alone with another friend, I might have been able to experience Japan better.

Dont get me wrong, I love Aiko with all my heart, I just don’t understand why she was so mean to me. (when I say mean, I mean she didnt seem to care if I was happy or not while in Japan) I felt like she just thought about herself.

She also bossed me around a bit…. I know its her country, but she doesnt have to tell me what to do generally.

One example that I think of is that when I was in the Taxi and waving to her aunt, Aiko turned and said “Wave to her”. She obviously didnt know that I was already waving, but she didnt have to tell me to do it!

I’m getting really tired of this.

She even mentioned once to me that, Japanese people think of the Job first then family.
I didnt like that at all. It made me feel like I would always been second to her (if not last). I asked ALOT of Japanese friends about this. They all said that Girlfriend/Wife/Husband/Boyfriend first, then Job, then other family.
I’m starting to think that Aiko is different from other Japanese people.
She hurts my heart so much, but I cant imagine myself with anyone else. I just hope she opens her eyes one day to realize that she wont fine a better and kinder person than me. Especially someone who doesn’t ask of much from her.

I mean, I bought her a few things like a dress and a digital camera, and she would be happy for a while. So it made me feel like I have to pay to see her be happy for me….

*sighs*

I wish I could have had more fun in Japan…..

I have virtually nothing these days.
Went to a friends home a few days ago and was too tired to drive home so I stayed in his room.
I was on the bed, but when I woke up I was on the mattress on the floor. No one knew how I got there.

We went to get him a webcam at a store, went with two more friends to Chilis to eat then I just went home.

New year in my country is for couples. All my friends went to a party and those who didn’t have a girlfriend just took any random girl. I didn’t want to do that with Aiko in Japan.
I tried to call her on New years but she was asleep and didn’t answer, it made me angry though, since the reason she was tired was because she went Snowboarding with some guy.
It’s nice isn’t it? I sit alone, and I’m not able to speak to my own girlfriend because she was busy playing sports with another guy. What also makes me angry is that when she’s with me, she always tells me she’s tired, how the hell does she have the energy to snowboard.

Let her just ONCE mention she’s tired when I’m in Japan with her, I’ll just explode.

My British room-mates had a new year party I hope they dont mess up the house, what’s worse is that she’s got a car and will probably use my space or something.

I got a PSP which is good, I need to buy 3 more though.

Anyway, I’m tired and not feeling to good, still a bit mad at aiko.